I feel like I have always been a Christian, I have always been a believer. I started attending church at a young age and continued through college. It's just what I thought I was supposed to do. When I moved to DC after graduation, I quickly joined The District Church and found a great community through my small groups. Since joining, I've felt incredibly challenged on my relationship with Christ and what it means to me to be a Christian. In the past, it's always felt like my relationship was more out of habit, not like that of a Teacher/Father/Groom, etc. I've grown so much in my journey over the past few years, but, for a while, have been feeling that I've been holding myself back. I knew I should probably get baptized and was easily coming up with a million excuses to not. The idea of getting baptized was always so scary to me.
"Getting in front of all those people."
"I am already a Christian, right?"
"I've been doing this thing for almost my whole life. Do I REALLY need to do this?"
I let a couple more years pass by with the thought still lingering. Not too long ago, I began obsessing on the idea of baptism, feeling the Spirit really challenging me. When I finally verbalized it for the first time, one evening after my small group ended, my co-leader overheard. And this testimony is a response to her email I received the following day.
To me, finally getting baptized—this full immersion kind—feels like a release of the idea to be a perfect Christian. To admit my faults, embrace my imperfections and all the gifts that God has given me to finally allow me to be a better follower. To let God sculpt me and, after years of avoiding this step, to listen to the Holy Spirit.